I can't seem to study. I basically studied for four hours, and I think that I need a break.
So I wanted to mention something that I heard today as I passed a couple of guys chatting about something--sports, I think. I thought I heard them say that in order keep our sanity, we need to gain. What I'm going to say doesn't necessarily pertain to sports, but of something in particular that I heard them (or believe I heard them) say. Anyhow, I think the idea of gaining something in order to keep one's sanity quite an interesting perspective, because it's true that if we have nothing to gain, then why bother to go on with life? I mean, after all, I would find myself, everyone and everything around me worthless. You might be able to continue giving but not being able to receive anything back would mentally damage self-worth, I believe. Consider how we need to take care of our bodies in order to cherish the more important things around us. If we do not exercise or keep a balanced diet, (and did drugs or became a bulimic, etc) then we could very well damage our bodies physically. This would carry on to hurt, attack and destroy the mind as we being to self-question our situation and the luck that we are in. Okay, so this example mostly goes for the people who are somewhat better off in terms of having some form of control in their daily decision-makings. Nevertheless, it should be obvious enough that we are in need things. I guess just be careful what you consider as the things in which you need in life. You don't need everything--just some things.
Anyway, there seems to be an interrelationship to "gain" for all living creatures on this earth.
What is it about this world that we can gain? I can think of many things. For example, I can think of being happy with the one that I love whenever I'm ready to be in a relationship (heh); or when I have awesome memories of the people that I value and cherish the most; or hear the laughters when someone says something funny; or when I get to eat a bag of potato chips and enjoy myself on the couch (plus, be lazy!). Yeah, there are many things and these are the simplest things that I can think of, which I know that most people can relate to.
There are days when I feel that I could lose my sanity because I overload with different types of thoughts that I would not be able to do anything about had I the will to. Now that I think about this, I believe that I readily would lose my mind when I [know that I] do not "gain" very much from thinking about mundane things that can be irrelevant to the situation that I currently would be in. I know that I often daydream about what I like to do with either friends, family, or the person that I like. Of course, I don't gain much from it, especially if I am trying to study for my orgo exam or microeconomics exam (or whatever else that I'm suppose to be focusing on). Then, I would automatically feel stressed that I'm not getting very much done, and realizing that so much time has passed since I started to space out. This is not the most productive style to approach, but it fascinates me that I could at least give a reason to my behaviors.
I've been very confused as how to deal with my problems, because I feel as though if I cannot control the way that I think or do something about it, I would probably not be able to do very much in life: I would fail at doing well in school, feel more depressed, and eventually keep to myself and straying away from a social life. I've done all of those before, but yet here I am....I'm still in school, I still talk to people, and I feel somewhat better about myself. I can smile, and laugh, and joke--just like you! :) But it does take a lot of honest effort to get better. I still have some paralysis of the mind, which sometimes happen randomly whenever I am too consciously [or unconsciously] stress out, I suppose. I don't know how to explain it in better terms, but I've been having some difficult times trying to focus because my mind shuts down on me and it feels "blocked" to the point that I wouldn't be able to think clearly. I don't know if anyone goes through this, but sometimes I wish I knew because I feel like I go through great pains not understanding why I keep doing this to myself. Once the plague lifts, however, I feel normal and I can practically go about my day doing things without too much of a problem; but it becomes a nightmare for me whenever it seeks me out. I only want to understand if this is the normal effect for stress. I'm hoping I will be able to overcome it one day. I'm sure that no one can ever surpass anything without falling a second time. The first time that you overcome one thing, the next that comes will not be so hard to deal with the second time because now you know how to respond to it in a more effective way.
I guess that's the trick of things. It is to figure out and identify that there is something wrong and doing something about it. Of course both are hard to do, but everything requires time. For this sort of process, you will need to enhance all of your senses. Practice them for they are your best friends. The body is precious for it is connected to the mind. If you can skillfully evaluate your actions and progress everyday through your senses, you will see the gains of it all. Therefore, keep your eyes open and keep your ears ready. Be patient for your eyes need light to see; and be patient for your ears will need time to adjust to the foreign noises.
SO I'm a little frustrated now because I just wrote a really long comment to your post and I couldn't post it, of course I didn't save it so I'll have to try to remember what I said a few minutes ago..lol
ReplyDeleteLet me begin by saying "Thank You" for ending this post in encouragement for us to be patient. I appreciate that. I think that this idea of gaining is interesting. I don't know that without it if we would lose our sanity but I think it is something to think on. I believe that perspective to whether we have something to gain or not is a starting point. I believe we all have something to gain and can admit that knowing we have access to get what we need is important, too. To live a life deplete of gain seemingly means that one has no vision of a big picture for themselves. Often times our vision/understanding of where we are in relationship to where we see ourselves soon, gets clouded by a difficulty in distinguishing our needs (gain) from what we don't need. It's interesting to read this post now, because I just posed a question, "What changes (if anything) or becomes of our lifestyles when we treat optional things as necessary?" I feel like we are surrounded by distractions all the time and that the desire to live beyond them in order to strive for what we need becomes, some times, overshadowed by not knowing that we have access to/can get what we deem necessary (for growth, maturity, happiness, delight, a sense of purpose and/or belonging, etc.)How does one get to a place where he or she can acknowledge that becoming comfortable with what he or she has, even if it isn't what he or she needs can become dangerous because progression, then, is seemingly meaningless/out of reach/impossible... How can we distinguish between living in what we want in opposition to what we need? How do we gain vision for the 'big(ger)picture' if we don't know that we can have beyond our wants? I believe we all have something to gain. I think that knowing that and being able to take hold of our access can be dwarfed by living amongst our wants when our needs will bring us fulfillment and 'sanity'. I appreciate this post and will continue to think on it. I will begin to pray for a desire to understand the big picture and for patience to remove distractions and seek clarity and a sense of gain...We all have something to gain and a future to fulfill. Thanks for sharing!
learned something just yesterday (and how convenient, too!) so I will tell you what I've learned in another post. Essentially, the point of my blog is to encourage people to think about themselves and simply their lifestyles. I'm really happy that you could post a feedback (and attempted a second try!). I'm sorry that you couldn't post the first time; it may be the way I have my settings for this blog, because it wasn't meant to be exposed for random people or even friends to see at first--but I changed my mind because I want people to know and I want people to think about their own life. So read on, and think about the truth and how it might be displayed in your own life! :)
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm not exactly sure who you are haha, but that hasn't been as important to me. If you get anything out of what I write then it is for you; and I don't need to know anything. Most of the time, I don't know who cares enough to read what I write.
As for praying, it is a very good start. I realize that you have to humble yourself--your very mind and heart to God before you can achieve an understanding. Patience has been the ruling of my own life. I've struggled because I was incredibly impatient throughout my growing years, but it I'm still learning nevertheless on being patient. It helps me not to take things for granted--that we are blessed with what we already have.
I'll pray for you, too! I hope your heart and mind will be more opened to new insights.
I really resonated with this post! I understand what you're saying about gain. I think I need to realize that I am actively choosing how to spend my time, and to remember to choose the best. Kind of like what you said, "I guess that's the trick of things. It is to figure out and identify that there is something wrong and doing something about it."
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Rebecca
I actually like your comment, Rebecca. :) I don't know if I could have said it in better terms. But I think that it's even better that you could relate to this post. I will have to keep that in mind as well...so thank you for your feedback!
ReplyDeleteOh, and just to put it out there, Rutgers has therapists at their Counseling and Psychological Services buildings on every campus. In case you want to talk about things and figure out what these emotions mean to you, talking it out with a professional can help you so much. Cause sometimes friends and pastors don't really know the answers to everything, and sometimes you need to just look at these circumstances objectively.
ReplyDeleteYup, I know. :) My depression was what led me there last year, but I find that sometimes even they cannot help. Depends on the situation and the person I suppose. Right now I'm doing myself a favor by being my own therapist. I understand that I cannot go through life alone, and especially not without help, but sometimes I people have to start with themselves first before seeking an answer elsewhere. But thank you for the suggestion. I'll definitely keep that in mind.
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